jamelah.net

Friday, January 31, 2003

reasons why i am going to stab blogger

1. i wrote the post directly beneath this last night. it said it published it. it lied.
2. no, that's enough, really.





posted by jamelah
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Thursday, January 30, 2003

jamelah request live

smg has spoken. i'm going to talk about some books, and why i believe that other people should pick up those books and read them. or, conversely, why other people should be spared the suffering. there's only one book in my life right now, and i think i've already talked about my other recent reads here (recent being a relative term, of course) but i'll be doing this sort of thing here & there in the future, as i stop being too frickin' lazy to read and start reading more. that's one of my new year's resolutions, you know. anyway.

(smg wins my gold star blog reader prize for today. yay!)

lolita - vladimir nabokov. okay, yeah. i picked up this book in december and i'm still not done with it. typically, that would mean that i hate the book and don't really feel any rush to get it finished. but in this case, it's more that i'm too frickin' lazy to read. i'm working on that. anyway, not being done with it means that i can't talk about it in its entirety, but i can say a few things about my impressions so far. those would be:

1. you know the books that are classics and you feel like you should read them because of that? this is one of those. a lot of the time, when i read something that's attained classic status, i come away wondering why. but that is not the case with lolita. i know exactly why this book is a classic. it's a classic because it's really damn good.
2. anyone who appreciates excellent prose craftsmanship should read this book. nabokov's writing is intensely beautiful, and the story (at least what i've read of it so far) is incredibly well told. it says on page one that "you can always count on a murderer for a fancy prose style." indeed.
3. the premise is sick, you know? i mean, humbert humbert is old enough to be lolita's father. but the way he tells his love story is so compelling that the age thing is not the primary issue. that may seem like a strange thing to say, but trust me on this.
4. sometimes, it's really funny.

i don't have more to say right now, which means that i should finish the book. i'll get to that before may, i promise.





posted by jamelah
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Wednesday, January 29, 2003

jamelah, live & by request*

i'm feeling a little bit crazy right now. ok, not really. i'm actually feeling a little bit unoriginal right now. i'm realizing that sometimes i just don't have all that much to talk about. it's not that my life isn't just hilarious moment after hilarious moment, because it is, but sometimes i have a hard time picking which particular moments of complete hilarity i will write about here. besides, there's more for me to write about than, well, me, as difficult as that is to believe.

so, down to the point. what should i write about? what would be most interesting to read? i've done all sorts of things, from bitching about why i hate the world to commenting on the ridiculousness of my existence. i even once simulated a phone conversation between me and my grandmother. and man, yeah. good times.

anyway, you tell me. your wish is my command.

...kinda.







*a pathetic ploy to get replies? maybe. but i'm serious. it's time that i let the people (all 2 or 3 of them) have their say.





posted by jamelah
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Tuesday, January 28, 2003

obligatory

i don't feel like summarizing my day. it wasn't worth talking about.

right now, i'm in the middle of one of those weird moods where i could either write forever or stay silent, and i'm trying to decide which way i'll go.

i think my need for sleep wins.





posted by jamelah
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Monday, January 27, 2003

it's not arachnophobia, really

so last night i drank half a gallon of water, then i took some nyquil and went to bed before 10:00. needless to say, i woke up at 5, really really having to go to the bathroom. i ignored that, and instead went back to sleep, not waking up until almost 8. now, since the way i feel can only be categorized as "not so good", i decided i would go directly back to bed after my sojourn across the hallway to the bathroom.

well, the best laid plans often get screwed over by the discovery of giant spiders on your pillow.

yeah. my story goes a little something like this:

i got up, walked across the hallway to the bathroom, looked at my reflection in the mirror and said, "gah." i went into the living room to retrieve the quilt that is like my linus blanket from the couch. i wrapped up tightly in the quilt, having an appearance much like a giant, quilted burrito. with arms. and feet. and hair. you know, things that make me not look like a burrito at all. but i digress. my mother informed me that the temperature outside had risen all the way from -9 degrees to -6 degrees and i said something like, "mmm." then she asked me if i was still sick, and i said something like, "mmm." she said she would call me later, and i said "mmm", and she left for work.

i stood there dumbly for a minute or so, as is the way i do things when i first get out of bed in the morning, then i remembered my warm, beautiful, lovely, nice, comforting bed that i was planning to sleep in all day long. i hitched up my quilt a little so it wouldn't drag on the floor, then i returned to my bedroom, which could also be referred to as "antarctica" since i don't know why it won't get warm in there. anyway, i was standing at the edge of my bed, contemplating whether to crawl in while wrapped in the quilt, or whether i should take the quilt off, and put it on top of my comforter for extra warm goodness. it was then that i noticed something dark on my pillow. i said to myself, "hm, there's something dark on my pillow." i leaned in a little bit closer and noticed that it was a spider. a large, green spider.

i stood there with my face mere inches from the spider for a few moments. i wasn't scared of the spider, but i wasn't going to crawl into bed next to it, either. i could've killed it, but i have issues with squashing spiders with kleenex. so instead, i left my room and closed the door, robbed of extra sleep by the arachnid on my pillow.





posted by jamelah
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Sunday, January 26, 2003

the stupid things i do

just because my throat is sore and i can't breathe doesn't mean that i'm too sick to smoke.





posted by jamelah
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who cares about the super bowl? i just redesigned!

yeah, okay. i know it's not all that much different from the last design. in fact, you may be thinking that i didn't really change anything. but if you're thinking that, then you're oh so wrong. because i just wrote all of this from scratch today. go me. and yeah, the archives are screwed up again. i'll work on that. sometime.

this may end up looking different again over the course of the next few days, because i have a plan. but i might just decide to get lazy and leave it this way for a really long time. who knows? i'm unpredictable.

now i'm going to go eat some ginger snaps, or something.





posted by jamelah
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meh?





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work damn you work





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testing yet again





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test?





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test test test testy test test test





posted by jamelah
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i'm going in...

i decided today that i am going to rewrite my blogger template. yeah, so.... yeah. it may look a little crazy in here for awhile until i get everything all straightened out. but i will prevail, because i am a champ.





posted by jamelah
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Tuesday, January 21, 2003

where there is no vision, the people perish

rant time. excuse me.

i got home about a half an hour ago from the latest debacle that can be referred to as a city council meeting. first of all, i was painfully deceived by the agenda: there were only two items for discussion, so the meeting should've been short, right?

ha.

hahahaha.

ha.

anyway... i sat there, in the back room with all the broadcast equipment (as is my job) listening to one of our council members blather on, essentially, about how our city is too poor to do anything. i hate this man. in fact, i was sitting there, with one of the cameras trained on his face, watching how smug he looked while he insulted the people of this community that i love so deeply, realizing what a small, pathetic, bitter, angry little man he is. leaders need vision, goddammit. he is in a leadership position in this city. he was elected. granted, he's there because there hasn't been anyone to run against him... but still. he has a responsibility as a leader to give a fuck about this town and to have some fucking vision and want to see this community improve. yes. times are hard. two major employers and the hospital closed down in 2002. that's bad. people are facing economic difficulty and could use a few breaks. it's true.

but how can you sit there on television and say that we can't do it? that we can't get better? that our hands are tied until someone else makes the effort to make our community a better place? screw that logic. and the horse it rode in on. because now... now that we're facing such difficulty... well, dammit (!!!!!!!!!) now should be the time when we have the most hope. we should be looking forward and saying, "ok, things suck. how do we make them better?" i swear i hate defeatism more than anything else. and it absolutely disgusts me that this defeatist bastard is one of the policy makers for the city, and he's not in my precinct so i can't vote against him.

grrr. grrr. and grrr again.

i love this city where i live, and i love the people here and i truly believe that it's time for good things to happen. but they don't happen unless we make them happen. i love my job (even though i complain about the tiny details) because i get to do things every day that help people in this city have some confidence and some hope. and i'll be damned if some asshole on the city council is going to tell me that nothing's ever going to get better because the people are too poor and incapable.

ok, i'm done.

goodnight.





posted by jamelah
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Monday, January 20, 2003

life's to do list

i've become overly fond of making lists these days. so here we go:

100 50 things i want to do before i die tragically from stupid thing i do to myself (the things i've already done, i crossed out. i needed to feel a sense of accomplishment today)

1. go to rome
2. go to paris
3. go to ireland
4. read finnegan's wake
5. go to new york
6. learn how to oil paint
7. make out with chris cornell (a girl can dream, can't she?)
8. publish a novel
9. own prada shoes
10. actually redeem my marlboro miles on something
11. play the piano really well
12. drink cuban beer
13. see the taj mahal
14. visit my father's homeland
15. figure out how to smoothly apply liquid eyeliner
16. drink a beer in a beer hall in munich
17. learn all the romance languages
18. learn arabic
19. redevelop my fluency in spanish
20. read the whole bible
21. try portuguese food
22. learn how to cook thai food
23. delve into the world of flash hilarity
24. actually understand something about math
25. watch weird japanese commercials... in japan
26. fingerpaint on someone
27. be able to flip a pancake without it falling apart in mid flip
28. have my own barbara walters special
29. ride in a gondola in venice
30. meet a boy who truly understands the important cinematic achievement that was dirty dancing
31. have my skin stop being so damn dry
32. cliff dive
33. dance with my father
34. stand in the sistine chapel
35. party in new orleans
36. see the northern lights
37. be in a play directed by kern again
38. go to australia
39. get my ph.d. and insist that people call me doctor
40. be interviewed for a documentary about something
41. learn to throw pots
42. have an herb garden that doesn't die
43. remember the name of that echoing trumpet song stefania played for my venetian music history class. that song was really fuckin' cool.
44. see the pietá
45. see the david
46. be able to fishtail braid my own hair
47. smoke a good cigar
48. pay off my student loans
49. learn a slavic language, at least passably
50. meet my brother





posted by jamelah
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Friday, January 17, 2003

what the world needs now is ricky martin, sweet ricky martin

dammit, where did he go? he's not like shania twain, you know... people like that can disappear forever and not make over-hyped comebacks, as far as i'm concerned. but ricky martin was just fun. and the world needs fun. it needs fun now. it needs fun in the form of ricky martin and his bon-bon of steel right this very minute! amen.

in other news, i decided, right around five minutes ago, that i actually do have some new year's resolutions. and it's never too late for self-improvement, or at least that's what i always say. ok, i don't always say that. in fact, this might be the first time in my life that i've said that, but that is not the point here. the point is, that in order to be the lean, mean jamelah machine that i know i can be, there are some things i need to do. things like:
1. smoke less. i don't want to quit, because quitting is for quitters, but i'm burning through about 40 bucks a week, and that just has to stop.
2. read more. and not in the form of text on the internet. i made a big long list of books i wanted to read when i graduated from college.... books i never had time to read because i was too busy with beowulf and the love poetry of john donne. i've read about five of those books, and i've been a college graduate for almost two years now. it's time i worked on that.
3. save some money. i want to get back to europe before i'm 25, and i can't very well afford to do that if i keep spending all my frickin' cash on cigarettes and shoes. so... yeah.
4. walk. i like walking. it is pleasant. i hate my car. it is unpleasant. i live in a small town, and everything is five blocks away. this one shouldn't be hard.
5. learn für elise. and i mean really learn it. not just in my half-assed "oh, that's close enough" way. i have the first part down, but it starts getting all feisty in the middle, and i'm going to straighten it out. oh yes.

right, then. here i am being all late for work again because i was updating my blog.

6. stop being late for work. yeah.

hallelujah.





posted by jamelah
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Thursday, January 16, 2003

shameless self promotion

dammit kids, this new project, the blog about nothing is better than getting a lollipop. (no, that's not a euphemism.) i encourage you all to run (don't walk) there now.





posted by jamelah
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Wednesday, January 15, 2003

of course

why i'm bothering to write about it is completely beyond me.





posted by jamelah
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frickin' blogger

so it's gotten into this new habit of telling me that it's publishing my posts, only to have me go look at my blog page and discover that it's LYING TO ME. no warm, posty goodness. no, nothing. just the post from yesterday. which is from yesterday. so, i propose that blogger needs to stop being a lying bastard and either tell me that it's just sitting on its ass and not publishing my posts, or it needs to publish my posts. one or the other.

you hear me blogger? you hear me?

i will stab.





posted by jamelah
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the cable guy of my discontent

so i'd been writing this immensely long rant about the lameness of this person i know and how it must be depressing to be that unoriginal, but i got to the end of it and two things happened:
1. i didn't care anymore.
2. the cable guy showed up.

now i should be at work about thirty minutes ago, but i have a bastard car that doesn't like to work in the winter, and is completely covered in snow. so i went outside in order to coax it into starting and warming up a little, when i noticed a young lad with a ladder traipsing across my front lawn. "oh, young lad with a ladder," i found myself thinking, "you are certainly handsome. i could jump your bones." i noticed the cable company van parked nearby and figured that he must be the cable guy of my dreams, (or something) so i checked him out a little bit, then i set about the task of starting the car.

task finished, i went back inside my house, thinking, "damn i'm so late i should just eat lunch at home and then stay at work all afternoon without a break." so i opened my refrigerator and scowled at its contents. would it kill us to have lettuce? apparently so. anyway, i had just closed the refrigerator door and headed to the cabinet thinking about a nice, warm bowl of soup when there was a knock at the door.

i answered it. oh cable guy of amazing cuteness, how i heart thee. i said the most brilliant thing. i said, "hi."

he smiled. it was then that i noted his teeth. (i am a fascist about teeth. they have to be white, and reasonably straight. a little crookedness here and there isn't bad... i think it gives a smile character. but dear god.) i can't describe them, except to say, "oh the horror! the horror!" i found myself running my tongue over my own pearly whites, thinking, "how can you even let that happen? don't you know that mr. toothbrush and mr. dentist are your friends?"

my love was shattered. shattered! i heard it shattering... it made a....shattering noise. words came out past the horrific teeth. words that sounded like, "your cable should be working now. do you want to check that out while i'm here?"

i nodded dumbly. i walked to my television and turned it on; there was the sound of television people speaking. from all the way across the house, i yelled, "yeah, it's working!" and he yelled back, "okay! thanks!" and he closed my door and walked on out of my life.

the end.





posted by jamelah
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Tuesday, January 14, 2003

depth perception

note: today's post will have nothing to do with the title. isn't that always the way?

let's see... everything appears to be returning to normal. i mean, the budget's been passed, i still have a job, people are settled in and quiet at work, i'm smoking way too many cigarettes per day, i'm sleepy a lot, the weather is cold, i ran out of shampoo, i am still unsuccessful in my quest for the perfect black sweater and i'm losing hope, people annoy me but i still like them okay, and i just asked my magic 8 ball if i would fall down at some point today and it said "without a doubt".

so that's that, eh? so now is the time to drag myself back to my office. oh, curses.





posted by jamelah
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Monday, January 13, 2003

you know what?

blogging is such a strange thing, really. like, i spew my thoughts and other random things about me here, and then i want people to read these things and say things back to me (hence the mainly unused comments link at the end of each post). it's like exhibitionist catharsis, or something.

i'd be really mad if you all came to my house and read my journal (my journal is where i say the stuff that i don't consider to be anybody's business, and i don't write in it much anymore). but i'll just say anything here. weird.

you know, if i put some effort into this post, it could be deep. or something. but what would be the point in that? i mean, really... what?





posted by jamelah
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yeah, okay

so far, it's been monday. i wish it would stop that.





posted by jamelah
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Saturday, January 11, 2003

on my mind

first: i just finished watching the movie minority report starring tom cruise and some other people. it was okay, i guess, except it kept not ending. i hate movies that do that, and you know the ones i'm talking about. they have a perfectly suitable ending, then go on for forty more minutes. yeah. of course, i suppose it was necessary to tie everything up neatly at the end, and have the good guys (who are named tom cruise) win and the bad guys (who are not named tom cruise) die. blah.

second: people are idiots. and no, i'm not going to specify.

third: my two favorite phrases in the world right now are "shut up" and "you godless couchfuck". the beautiful part of these phrases is that they can be combined into one ultra-mega-phrase: shut up, you godless couchfuck. oh, it makes me a little teary-eyed.

fourth: i have a mystery bruise on my foot. i'm not one of those people who bruise easily. in fact, it generally takes quite a severe... something... to bruise me. things so severe, i remember them later. but no. i've got this little bruise speck on the top of my right foot. nobody stepped on my foot. i did not step on my own foot. nothing was dropped on my foot, nor was my foot run over by a truck. the bruise wasn't there before i went to bed. in fact, it wasn't even there this morning. it just magically appeared, right around 1:20 p.m., eastern standard time. feh.

fifth: i guess i could come out and say that i'm actually not as evil as people think i am. i don't tend to harbor grudges. i'm quiet. i read books. i get my feelings hurt a lot, and as such, i've become good at counting my losses and moving on. i am, for all intents and purposes, that geek girl in the corner. yeah, i could come out and say that, but i won't. i have a reputation to uphold.

sixth: i'm really upset about this bruise. where did it come from? where? where, damn you, where?

seventh: is there anything nicer than a beautifully made bed and freshly-washed sheets? the answer to that, of course, is yes... yes there is.

eighth: i hate typing the word "eighth".

ninth: i had a dream the other night about the boy i spent at least half of my high school years being completely in love with. i don't know why i decided to dream about him, as i haven't seen this boy in almost five years, and i haven't had any sort of correspondence with him for at least two. the dream itself was both cryptic and unsatisfying, which would make sense, since almost every experience i ever had with this boy was exactly that way.

tenth: i don't think people use the word "verily" enough these days. i like this word a great deal, and as such, i'm bringing it back. call it a one-woman language revolution, if you will. i think i would appreciate that.

now comment, or i shall weep. and trust me, you don't want a weepy jamelah. i don't cry very much and once i get started, i can't stop until i'm all red-faced and hiccup-y. don't make me go there. just don't.





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Friday, January 10, 2003

canonize me

for i am a saint. sometimes, i'm so nice it hurts.





posted by jamelah
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Thursday, January 09, 2003

but i was just so hungry

i broke down and ate a couple york peppermint patties from the candy bowl. of course, i very rarely eat candy, as... candy is bad for me and i've gotta feel superior and healthy somehow, right? anyway, i ate the york peppermint patties and felt better, but, since sugar is the devil, now i feel both nauseous and in need of a nap. feh.





posted by jamelah
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what someone just told me:

"i could kiss girls, but i could never just be like, 'oooooh. boobies.'" - stacy, on... something. i can't remember the context of this particular quotation.





posted by jamelah
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couple of things

i finally cleaned up my links on ----> that side of the page to accurately reflect my pages and other pages. neato. i also updated this last night, and i do have to say that interviewing myself and a magic 8 ball... well, it's good times.

i've also learned a couple of things so far today that i thought i would share.
1. that damn internet contraption is as addictive as crack.
2. if, instead of brushing my hair, i put it up in some kinda crazy knot thing on the top of my head, then secure it with a rubber band and go to bed, when i wake up in the morning my reflection in the mirror will scare me when i walk into the bathroom. oh, the crazy spikes coming from the left.
3. that's all. but isn't having three items in a list nicer than having two items in a list?





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Wednesday, January 08, 2003

and

how big of a geek am i for that last post?





posted by jamelah
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hey!

i somehow got my archives to work. i mean, they all published. i don't know how i did it, but it involved me being intrepid and fiddling around with some javascript that i didn't understand. there's some kinda weird thing going on with my stylesheet on the archive pages, but that's a minor thing, really. i believe that i indeed rock the casbah!





posted by jamelah
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i'll have the spam spam spam spam spam spam spam personal message and spam

i'm over complaining about how i don't get any e-mail from anybody telling me what a super genius i am. (though, you know... i wouldn't be unhappy if someone were to write me and do such a thing.) but the void in my inbox has led me to start actually reading the spam that i get. it's sad. but then, so many things are.

and since i am a super hilarious genius, i'm going to do this commentary on

THE TOP FIVE SPAM E-MAILS I RECEIVED YESTERDAY AND TODAY:

let's go. (in no particular order.)

1. jamel_07, we buy judicial judgments!
now, first of all, i have never, in the entire time i've used electronic mail for my correspondence needs, used "jamel_07" for a handle, and this would be for a couple of reasons. namely, i am not jamel, nor have i ever been 07. the thing that bothers me about this message is that it only says, "134812 LYK 01'07''03 C25 ©....0171...©." i don't know what this means, nor can i fathom what it has to do with the purchase of judicial judgments, however, it seems to me that buying judicial judgments is wrong. and caily kingswood, if i am to believe that this is the spammer's true name, should be ashamed of herself.

2. it's easy to locate personal information about anyone!
other than the fact that this message opened with, "Dear haligan451 , rt lu dgzz mo yx," this just bugs the hell out of me. i don't want to locate anyone's personal information. i mean, i don't mind having the addresses and phone numbers of people i know, but if they're not willing to give me this information, then i'm not gonna go hunting for it. because i believe that could be viewed as stalking. and really, i'm too lazy to stalk anybody. that's just too much work, you know?

3. i found that url
gee, marissa. thanks for hunting down xxx date! i've been hoping for something like that, you know... i especially like how you were kind enough to add some pictures of naked women in the e-mail. that really does so much for me, considering the fact that i am a straight woman. yeah. apparently, if i decide to use xxx date for my xxx dating needs, i'll be hearing things like, "hey, didn't i fuck you yesterday?" from all the girls. nice.

4. where is she?
i don't know. i didn't even know she was lost. well... apparently she will be, if i don't do something about my small penis and lack of stamina. yeah. apparently, the woman in my life doesn't want to hurt my feelings, so she won't tell me how upsetting my dismal performance in the bedroom is, instead, to help me save face.... she'll dump me. other than the fact that i'm not a man, and have no interest whatsoever in sleeping with women, um.... yeah. i'd say that if you believe you have to resort to some stupid pill to make your penis grow in order to keep your relationship, then you've got issues. the main one of those issues being that you are, quite simply, an idiot.

5. pay off those student loans ha
well, i do need to pay off my student loans, but (and this could just be me being old fashioned) i figure the way to do that is by having a job and sending checks to the loan people. crazy, aren't i? apparently so, because if i'd just work with this company, i'd be set for life. it's true. there are testimonials. my favorite of these being, "Jason F. Landscaper: '$18,000 per month, now I pay someone else to mow my huge lawn!'" hooray for you, jason f. hooray for you. honestly, the main reason i included this one is because it says "ha" at the end of the subject line, and quite frankly... that's funny.

wasn't that fun? yeah... i know.





posted by jamelah
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Tuesday, January 07, 2003

fun with keywords

every once in awhile, i like to read my site statistics... you know, to give me an idea of what people look at when they visit my pages, and how they get there, and what they were looking for... that sort of thing. today, i was reading the keywords used to reach my site... and hell's bells, myrtle... people are sick. i've decided to list them out for you. they're entertaining.*

biography
- jamelah
- jamelah asmar page 3

photograph index:
- jamelah
- jamelah pictures
- jamelah pictures naked

blog:
- linkwww100wordsnet
- johnny cash applebee's commercial
- jacob beam
- song i am tired and i want to go home

index:
- jamelah
- wwwjamelah

index2:
- girl photography
- photography+girl
- girl pictures
- jamelah

chapbook:
- buy my book
- sketches of a return journey
- buy book stapler

and now for the fun part...

imperceptible love poems:
- touch me like the rain
- i want to feel your skin against my skin
- poem lost and found you

satan story 1:
- traffic was a bitch

satan story 2:
- my secretary closed the door

satan story 3:
- dress shirt swordfish
- fuck britney
- fucking britney spears

satan story 4: (about a boy selling his soul, not incest. not incest in the slightest.)
- son fuck mom
- son mother fuck stories
- son fucking mom
- mom and son fuck story
- mother fuck son stories
- son fuck mother stories
- son fuck mother story
- pirate captain cane
- mother son fuck story
- son fuck mom story
(i was wondering why that particular page was getting so many hits....)

satan story 5: (about some tight underpants)
- fuck me in my underpants
- tighty whiteys

satan story 6: (office supply drama, and a fight with archangel gabriel. much swearing.)
- gabriels fist
- tape dispenser love her
- fist fuck

yes, i do tend to use the word "fuck" in my fiction... especially the fiction about satan, because i figure he's satan and he can swear like a drunken sailor with tourette's. but the stories aren't meant to be erotic in the slightest... and they aren't. those word combinations don't even show up in the stories. i'm amazed, really. i am disappointing a lot of horny people, apparently.

but that's what i'm all about, you know.... disappointing the horny.





*for those of you who don't know, there is a popular porn star who is also named jamelah. people come here a lot looking for naked breasts, and keep leaving disappointed.





posted by jamelah
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et cetera

yeah, over the funk from yesterday. down to business...

i took a quiz today that told me i was destined to have sex with heath ledger. who knew? i'm sure he doesn't.

since my car is being a bastard, i walked to work today. it's very cold and windy. bah. and icy. i slid around a lot. which was actually kinda fun. i do have to ask... is there a better cd to listen to while walking to work on a freezing cold day than ok computer? i don't think so. especially when it gets to "exit music (for a film)" because it's very dramatic. and if you haven't guessed, i have a dramatic streak.

what else? my boss is making me go to this meeting that he can't go to because he double booked himself. i hate meetings. he's also going to steal my pens. make no mistake. i didn't get to tape my warning (warning: this pen is the sacred property of jamelah, purchased with her own money. steal it, and she will put the hurt on ya.) to the pens, and when i get back to the office from this here lunch break i'm on, those pens will have disappeared into his briefcase.

klepto.

i also guess i have to run the evening program by myself tonight. whee.





posted by jamelah
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Monday, January 06, 2003

grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

it's simple really... it's monday. and here are the things that are wrong:

1. it's cold outside.
2. you know the scene in jurassic park where the t-rex is attacking the kids in the jeep? remember the sound it made? yeah, the power steering in my bucket o'crap car is making that sound now everytime i turn the wheel. awesome.
3. my office leaks cold air.
4. i have to go to the city council meetings to run the cameras for the local cable broadcast, and tonight the cable feed wasn't working but i still had to sit at the fuckin' council meeting anyway.
5. this one i'm not going to tell. because i don't feel like sharing.

honestly, i think i'm getting tired of having a blog. i mean, it's not like i believe in sharing anything but superficial information on the internet (except with a select few), and more and more i find that i'm running out of trivialities. of course, i'm having a really rough day (week, month, life... something) and everything seems like a big deal right now. i'll probably change my mind about this tomorrow, so... until then.

sometimes you could just use a hug, you know?





posted by jamelah
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the new diet coke can is causing me trauma

it's so space agey and hideous. i want my cute diet coke can with the fun little bubbles of joy back. bastard coca cola corporation, just can't leave well enough alone.

meh. i can hear my boss coming back. more later.





posted by jamelah
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Saturday, January 04, 2003

score!

i am an overcomer. i was looking for something i might eat for lunch today (though i just looked at the clock and realized that it's way past lunchtime) and my choices were pretty slim. i could make some couscous, or i could drink some peach schnapps. neither choice was appealing to me. but then, then(!) i saw it: the can of refried beans! i would make bean dip!!!!!!!!!

it was like an epiphany.

so now i am enjoying a plate of yummy nachos. man, i rule.

in other news, i just got this email:

sender: shockingnews
subject: jamelah, grow your Penis safely and Naturally

obviously, i had to read this message right away! it says:

NOW YOU CAN HAVE A BIGGER PENIS JAMELAH!!!
This Doctor Approved Pill Will Actually Expand, Lengthen And Enlarge Your Penis Safely And Naturally100% GUARANTEED!


and that's when i got disappointed. i mean, they seem to be working from the assumption that i have a penis, and i do not. damn.

damn damn damn.

cheated again.

i mean, what if i just wanted to grow one? like a houseplant? did they ever think of that?

i really shouldn't allow myself to post when i have low blood sugar.





posted by jamelah
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Friday, January 03, 2003

happy new year

i keep meaning to redesign, and then i keep not redesigning. so guess what? it's just going to look like this for awhile longer and i'll eventually learn to like it. i've developed this obsessive email checking syndrome. i really need to stop it, though, as i never get any email. well, except from spammers. they like to email me a lot. and thank god, otherwise i'd feel lonely.

nothing funny happened today, so i don't have a story. maybe tomorrow.





posted by jamelah
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